Oh, what a good song by John Melloncamp! We have a customer at work who hates our hold music. He tends to be a little crotchety but I like him, he’s funny. This is my first week trying to do the 7-4 shift since we lost Mr. YY. So far, not gone so great. Monday I had to have a heating dude come take a look at my stuff because the house is not warm. The warmest it was over the 7 days since the blizzard was 63. At one point it was down to 58. Since it is only supposed to be 8 tomorrow, I really wanted to get it addressed. Apparently there was nothing wrong other than the heat pump not being elevated enough so all the condensation was icing it over. And by icing it over, I mean turning it into a frozen, rock hard lump of ice. Antartica style. So he switched me over completely to emergency heat & said call us when it thaws & we’ll jack it up. Hope this doesn’t jack up my electric bill but it can’t be any worse than it running CONSTANTLY for like 8 hours straight. So I’ve decided cooler actually isn’t so bad & have adjusted the schedule according cause it was acutally HOT when I came home Monday. Guess the furnace works.
Downside to me going in early is the boys have to get up at 5:30 to go to Little Friends before school and they have to go to bed at 8. So far they are adusting OK I think other than last night it being almost 9 before they were asleep. Suprisingly not overly tired this AM. Upside, is that if I can get my butt out of my chair at 4 when I should, I’ve got a fair amount of time in the evening. Working on that part. I’m picking 009 up after school Wed & Thur after battle of the books & math bowl so I hope that helps form the habit. Cause that’s really all life is, habits. I don’t really need to give them any of my time for free. However, I did get a raise, which is cool cuase 2 years ago, everyone got a pay cut. This year, now, they’ve gotten it all back, which is also cool as everyone has worked very hard with a lot less to do more. I think most every business can say that. I think it’s a good sign that the wheels are starting to turn.
Speaking of habits, I got myself a pedal thing. Not like a complete stationary bike, as I don’t have room for them & most of the seats are not “vagina-friendly” as I read in O magazine this week…gotta love that; it is a great way to describe it… but just one that sits on the floor & lets you sit in a normal chair. So I do that, and read my magazines (obviously) or watch TV while I do it. It is amazing, if the counter is to be believed, in a half-hour time, I can burn 300+ calories. That is easily 3x what I can do on the rower. Weird part, I’m more sweaty after the rowing. So which one is the better deal? Not sure. I wasn’t really losing any inches or firming anthing up with the rower so I became very disastified with the result in propertion to the effort. Not sure this is going to be any better. Last week we didn’t go to Kokomo & we won’t this week either so I will miss the 2 mile walk again, but I like saving the gas/money.
This morning, backing out of the snow-walled driveway (honestly not that bad, but 2+ feet in places…) I managed to get the car stuck & let a “shit” fly with the boys in the car. Not happy. I was so going to be early/on time & I was so stoked as I’ve really struggled over the past year getting there before I’m supposed to be. Had to change shoes. Dig out the car. Texted my boss. It acutally came out faster/easier than I thought, praise God. Got the boys to Little Friends, they had the door fixed where 007 “broke” it last night. They are automatic sliders, but he ran into them & they are supposed to “give” and swing open. It did,. Just didn’t go shut, so they wouldn’t glide. He said “Oh good, now I don’t have to feel so guilty anymore” Poor guy, I felt bad for him because I knew he felt awful as soon as he did it, but he’s got to learn to chill it a bit too. He went on to say maybe it was OK cause he learned he can’t do that. That’s a step…
Sunshine laughed at me, but did say he would have helped pull me out I needed it. He’s got a nice big truck. He’s trying to sell it, I do like it, but I’d really like to get a charger or camero or mustang instead. None of them practical on the ice, but then what wheeled vehicle is practical on the ice? So I get there about 5 minutes late. He comes up & starts talking & just like, well, keeps talking & we’re talking wreck stories. Luckily I don’t have nearly as many, or as bad, as him. But it makes me think back to a year ago when I just wasn’t even sure I could keep working with him because he could just be a dick. But I stood up for myself over something & ever since then, well, we’ve had a pretty decent working relationship. We talk & joke & flirt a bit. We’ve even gone to lunch a couple of times, with Big. Too bad he’s married, I guess. Although he needs to stop buzzing his head, he looks better with some hair. He called me vivacious today. Wow, what a word! ;) Usually I’m just the scheduling maven, which is better than being the scheduling bitch, however, yesterday he did call me the ticket nazi. That’s probably true, but it is part of the job, along with scheduling.
So Big & I went to lunch today, Taco Bell, which was really not so good, I got the Stufd Steak Burrito without beans, as refritos are horribly full of calories & cholesterol. Love beans, but not those (but they are yummy, but I’m trying to watch a bit what I’m eating too). And I’ve shared with him that I joined Match (I know he had before he got married) and told him that I really wasn’t doing any better with the virtual dating than I was with the real life stuff & I had the epiphany that I was in fact, PAYING to be REJECTED. How screwbally messed up is that?!?! I must be some sort of freak. And, well, there have been a few that it has matched me up with or that I’ve found who have promise, but I don’t get anything from them after I message them. So it really is just like real life.
And then I wonder if I’m not holding true to my statement that I want the man to make the first move. And then I get all stuck on that & don’t know what to do. So if I email him first, is that me making the first move, or no? I don’t know & I’m obsessively stuck on that. I might as well be rain man saying “definitely, not my underwear, definitely…” sheesh for pete’s sake! Or they are like vultures decending on fresh meat. Wow, no thank you.
Mr. Bulldog called last week & I don’t know how got on the subject (geez, dude, you’re married! But maybe he’s just naturally chatty, I don’t know!) but he asked if I were single & I said yes, I am, in fact I’ve not been on a date for over 18 months. To which he was very surprised & said it had to be by choice because he was sure I had men knocking down my door. And I said, yes, but I’ve not even been asked out once, to which he thought that was even more odd. I ended up having The Hobbit help him. For 2 reasons, I knew he’d get it done faster than me & 2 I like the dude too much & don’t really want to talk to him as it cannot go there. I have rules as Big would say. And they are for a reason, I know how I am.
It made me think about how when I was younger everyone used to always say “oh, don’t worry honey, you’re gotta have to beat them off with a stick” or “they’ll be knocking your door down”. And how I wanted that to be true so much. I’d see other girls in the class get that kind of attention, but never me. And I would keep waiting for it, because everyone told me it would happen. But you know, it never did. And it never has. And it probably never will. And now I just think it is a very cruel thing to tell any young person that. Or un-young person. And most times it just makes me wonder what is wrong with me. Cheryl says it’s because God knows “I’ve got work to do” with this Wounded Heart book. I suppose, but it is not a very satisfying answer.
I’m giving the message again in two weeks. Guess I’m going to have to get a move-on with it. The litergy looks like it is over “obedience” so if I can figure out how it fits in my life, I think I’ll come up with something pretty good. Right now I have to be obedient to my alarm clock so I can get up at 0430 in the am.
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