No Foolin'!

 It is April, and in the typical Birthday Week fashion, rainy and overcast!  LOL but fairly warm. Saturday was gorgeous!  I was down in Richmond, IN at my brother & SIL's for Easter. Got to see my nephew, my aunt, uncle, other brother and his wife, dad, and baby brother. She made a super yummy dinner and we had a great time.  Made sure my baby brother got to ride down with me, as he's always asking.

Old Business:

1. Almost done with Power.  Into the workbook section, so I think that is going to be interesting.
2. Chores and downtime, I think I need to start blocking and gating.
3. Still reading Eleanor.  Starting to get good.
4. Doing OK with trail guide. I signed up for the 3 month subscription for the NCBTMB test, so I need to get cracking.
5. Still bad with P4S.
6. Magazines, doing pretty good.
7. Stress test and echo are done.  While I do have some mitral and aortic regurgitation, he says he does not feel it is bad enough to cause my symptoms. So, back to the drawing board.  I was thankful for my brother and his wife to come up and go with me to it.
8. Have not started the next layout yet.
9. Garage is so-so. Got water inside the last couple times it rained, so that's put a damper on it a bit.  However, did put together the 2 lanterns that were painted, and put the lights in them, and so far, they are staying put on the holders I made for the fence. And lighting up.
10. Guitar is good, at 28 weeks now.
11. Need to set up appointment with lawyer and dad to do the co-guardianship.

New Business:

1. I have been out weeding and edging once or twice a week, just to try and get a little head start.
2. We've had a couple of good windstorms, so I've also been out picking up sticks a few times instead of waiting until I'm ready to mow.
3. Going to change the oil in the lawnmower this week.
4. Maybe going to plant the bushes that I overwintered along the "new" section of the fence so I can start working there.
5. Probably need to mow the yard this week/weekend. Thinking about maybe pushing it to get the clippings.  Will depend on whether or not it goes to seed before I get there.

Crocus are gone already, but now I have daffodils, bleeding hearts, grape & regular hyacinth, and forsythia. I did see a small nub of asparagus peeking up, the magnolia tree has buds that are almost out, and the lilac is starting to bud out. My hydrangeas are starting to get little green growths around the crowns, and my ligularia are popping up. So excited!

Spring of Deception

 Oh my goodness, it was so nice over the weekend.  I had Friday off to celebrate my Alive Day, and did some inside stuff - guitar, mending, etc. and went over to Encounter Cafe for lunch. So absolutely adorable, and run by 2 of the best humans I know. Saturday I spent some time outside doing some weeding and edging, and am definitely ready to get covered up where we put the fence back, but on the outside of the fence.  It's been a long time coming. Sat out back and had a beer too, first one of the season.  That was so good.  And on Sunday, I got a visit from 020 (got in late Saturday) and we had coffee and cookies, then I cooked a yummy breakfast and lunch. We worked on some homework, took a nice, long (2 mile) walk around town and then had dinner. It was a perfect day!

Old Business:

1. Still going hard with Power.  Have learned some good things, and also good reinforcement on others.
2. Chores and downtime are starting to find a good rhythm.  
3. Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine is starting to pick up a bit, and starting to enjoy it.  I always have this trouble when I start a new book.
4. Have done a couple more times of Trail Guide.
5. Still bad with P4S
6. Magazines are going great!
7. Have Stress Test appointment and Echo next week.  Yes, I did have trouble on the walk with the kiddo, but we went slow and that helped. But yea, I can feel it this AM.
8. Have another LO done, and another one to start on the craft table.  That's pretty exciting.
9. Been trying to keep the garage cleaner. And I have 2 lanterns to finish up, and 2 more to start.
10. And guitar is going well, up to 23 weeks!

New Business:

1. Made it to the lawyer to finish up my will, yea!!! And talked with him about guardianship of my younger brother.  So I think at this point, getting on as co- with my dad would be the correct next step.  We will all talk at Eric's birthday party on the 9th.  022 will be there so we can celebrate 023 with them!! OMG!
2. Interviewing another therapist for Heart & Soul. So excited about that too! K1 & K2 and I have talked about it a bit, and they are both on board, and excited about the possibilities. It will definitely mean having to use the laundry over at K1's a lot more, but I need to see that as a good thing. K1 has dropped down to working only in the afternoons 1-2 appointments, so using during the day shouldn't be an issue.  And we'll still have ours going, I'm sure.
3. I'll be staying overnight with my friend again, after he has knee #2 done. Looking forward to catching up.
4. Now that temps are increasing again (but I'm nobody's fool, I  know it is temporary) I can start thinking of getting back to taking care of the doors.
5. There is so much outside maintenance to do this year, I'm concerned I won't get the weeding done that I need to do. I need to get to where I am doing one, and then weeding as a reward while it is drying (like painting door and window frames, repairing screens, staining ramp, etc.) None of it is big stuff, just stuff I need to get done.

I'm sure we will have another cold snap again, but I have to admit it really soothes my hear to see all the crocus in bloom, and tulips and daffodils and allium peeking up from the dirt.  And the pussy willows are fuzzy!

Second Winter

 Well.... we're moving out of false spring into second winter, here in Indiana.  It was nice to see the sun for a few days, both makes it easier and harder to face the cloudy days.  But I also know I'm not quite ready for the spring projects yet as I've not completed the winter projects I thought I'd get done.  Sigh, but it does seem to be a fact of life, only so much energy, and maybe less as you get older.  Or I'm just getting into a bad rut.

Old Business:

• Still going hard with Power.  Have learned some good things, and also good reinforcement on others.
• Chores and downtime are starting to find a good rhythm.  
• Finished Dust.  Dang it!  LOL  The whole series is so good!  Started Eleanor Oliphant is Just Fine.  Quirky, recommended by my fellow ND cousin.  And the main character is ND, and told from first person voice, which I find odd after so many from third person.  LOL
• Fell off the trail for Trail Guide, but I'll get back to it.
• Still bad with P4S
• Magazines are going great!
• Walking now even seems exertional.  Have had about 3 weeks now of palpitations. Went to cardiac consult, he does not seem concerned, however, he did order a stress test and echo, so we are awaiting prior approval.
• I have kept scrap table cleaned off, but need to do another layout.  I'm finding it difficult to gain momentum and keep it going.
• Have worked a bit out in the garage, have a lantern project going for my outdoor lights, as a way to maybe keep them lasting longer.
• And guitar is going well, up to 21 weeks!

New Business:

• Second verse, same as the first!  LOL
• Trying to lean into 020's strategy of "done quickly or badly beats not being done at all".  Maybe just quickly/best effort at the time, as opposed to badly...

Janus Coin

 I think I spend most of my time looking both back in time and forward in time. I've really been trying lately to just focus on NOW. Easier said than done, but I know the more times I catch myself, and tell myself the easier it will become, and the more I will do it.  The brain is absolutely amazing like that!

Old Business:

• Still reading Power.  At the time, just reading a page or two doesn't seem like it does much, but I'm 2/3 done with it doing this. Just over breakfast.
• Still getting more consistent with chores and downtime. Been really tired lately, so I've had to pay more attention to that. But trying to be more intentional, and use the same theory as the book - small steps still add up. Even if it is just one baby step a day.
• Dust is soooo good.  Also about 2/3 through it. Obviously, I read more of it.
• Back to the Trail Guide again. And, again, it's just knowing that even if I take a break, I will get back to it, and that is OK.
• Haven't been able to do that with P4S, sigh.
• Magazines are going well. Laughed at myself that I'm only 10 years behind now.
• Mostly walking. Did try running last weekend, and that went well, except I had a few cardiac events afterwards.  Have had to shovel several times, and have to be careful there too, as the next day the heart gets funny.  Have a cardiac appointment on 2/8 and have some notes and pictures to take with me.
• Since the craft table is cleaned off, I actually scrapped a layout last weekend!  Go me!  It felt good.
• All garage activity has been suspended due to the negative temps.
• Been doing pretty good still with guitar.  I'm up to 19 weeks, which is my longest.  Just trying to have fun with it.

New Business:

• Same as before...Just find a flow/rhythm that works for me.

Happy 2024!

 Can you believe it is 2024 already?  I still remember December of 1999 when the whole tech industry thought the world was going to come crashing to a halt due to Y2K.  Ended up being a nothing burger!  I wonder if 2999 will be the same way?!

Old Business:

• Still reading Power. Getting more consistent with scheduling chores and downtime, and definitely still a process!  How do you neurotypical people do it!?  It can be so exhausting.
• Finished Shift, and now reading the final book, Dust.  I don't want it to end!!!
• Trail Guide has been shaky!  020 was up for Christmas, and well, that was more important.
• Still failing at P4S
• Magazines, doing really well.
• Walking/Running, not so good, but working at it.
• Craft table is DDDDOOOOONNNNEEE!  Cleaned off memorabilia that was a year old!  Sheesh!
• I did spray paint all the "new" wicker furniture.  Way too many cans, it was so thirsty. But it is now out of the garage, and packed up in the shed.  Need to figure out better storage for them.
• I even collected all the landscape lights, fixed a few, and got rid of too many that I could not fix. Gadget was right, I just need to take better care of them.  I've purchased (actually donut dude did, but that is a long story) a bunch of lanterns from flea markets, and I've got an idea to use them in there, and hang from the fence.  I think that it will look prettier, and keep them nicer/safer from weather.
• Pies are done, and they were soooo yummy!
• Chiro and therapy scheduled out for Q1 and part of Q2
• Curtains in the mending pile
• Guitar going great!

New Business:

• Keep plugging along! LOL
• Trying to figure out a better management system for all the different areas of my life.
• Try to stretch and build my executive function muscles.
• Just be more consistent, and try to figure out how to not get overwhelmed so much.

It's beginning to look a lot like...

 ...Christmas? Not really.  We've had a few flurries, some even stuck around for a day, but alas, it is mostly brown out there. Some of the arborvitae are still green, some are transitioning to bronze (not my favorite, but nature does what nature does...) and the garden is definitely hunkering down for winter. I was able to add a few more loads of leaves to the pile, and may be able to get more, but if I don't, I don't.

Old Business:

• Still reading Power. Getting better at scheduling my chores and my downtime.  It's a process.
• Shift is amazing!
• Trail Guide I've had some trouble with, I was sick last weekend, and took a break.
• P4S still a fail!  LOL
• Magazines, doing good.
• Walk/Run still needs help.
• Craft Table still needs attention.
• Guitar - up to 14 weeks!!!
• Sanding booth is DDDOOOOOONNNNNNEEEE!  Go me!!!! In fact, I'm hoping today to spray paint some of the outdoor furniture that needs attention!
• Blood draw done, and just 2 arms this time. We'll see what results it yields.  Should know by Monday, or Tuesday at the latest at my appointment.

New Business:

• Wicker furniture repair and paint. I never treated it, and it was probably really supposed to stay inside, so it has some damage from being outside.  I think fixable, and once I paint it, it will hold up outside better.
• Make pies for Christmas
• Schedule chiropractor appointments for 2024
• Schedule therapy sessions for 2024
• Found some great curtains at Goodwill last night. I'm going to strip them down and make shades for the dining room!  Absolutely gorgeous fabric, botanical print and the colors fit perfectly!  Will bring a lot of character!

Thanksgiving, Friendsgiving, Selfgiving...

 OK, I made that last one up, but I do very much enjoy just being by myself. I am eternally grateful that I finally now not only understand and accept that, but thrive in it. I can remember glimpses as a child and feeling wholly myself when alone. I also have glimpses of when I felt incomplete when I was alone.

It is a beautiful sunny morning here in NE Indiana. I am waiting for my hair to dry a bit before going to have some breakfast. I see piles of leaves slowly settling and decomposing, waiting for next spring and summer to be spread upon the garden beds to nourish whatever life I might be able to grow there. The piles are not as big this year, but perhaps there is still time to add to them before the snow covers it all. I see a big pile of brush, again waiting for next spring, summer, and fall to be chipped and spread. No surprise that I have had the best luck with it in slowing weeds' progressions.  And I must say, that the front beds have gotten so much better at not growing as many weeds. Flowers are filling in, I've been very good this year at keeping them clean, and so perhaps that will have a snowball effect so that I can keep more of it clean.

The arborvitae are still green, it has not been cold enough yet for them to turn bronze. The fig tree dropped all of it's leaves during the last frost, and sadly, the remaining fruit did not ripen. I have half a mind to trim them off and plant them around just to see what might happen.

I'll be travelling down to the big city today to spend the day with my ex, his wife, and the kiddos. I've made a french apple pie, and I'll also take the leftover scones and lemon curd from last weekend's women's fellowship. I never got any trick or treat takers, so I've bagged up some candy to take down to share as well.

I hope this message finds you wherever you need to be today. Know that you are loved and wanted. You matter, and I am thankful for you.

Old Business:

• Still reading Power. Yes, still helpful. Have continued to try and have my bigger meals during the early part of the day. Also trying to be better at "scheduling" home chores and fun things so that they actually get done.
• Shift is getting really good, and I don't want the story to end!
• Back onto the Trail Guide.
• Planning for Success is still a fail.
• Magazines, doing great!
• Need to actually schedule walking/running so I do it!
• Craft table needs more work.
• Guitar - I'm up to 11 weeks!!!
• Sanding booth - I cleaned up that bay of the garage last weekend so I can start working on it again. So, progress!
• I was able to cover up all the areas that I got weeded, and that used up the leaf pile from last fall. It was glorious to have so much!  And all the weeds I pulled out? Well, I've been putting them in the "trench" where the sewer line was replaced. It's now almost level again from where it had all settled.
• Had 020's birthday with 022, and my brother and sis in law.  It was wonderful! 

New Business:

• Trip Ideas: See the Savanah Bananas, Float Troy, and Hocking Hills OH.
• Have some GR notes I need to type up.
• Need to get my online schedule updated.
• Need to get more bloodwork done. My lipid panel came back better this year, dropped 60~ points and triglycerides look good. Heart scan came back great. But white blood cell count down, hemoglobin near low, iron low so we're doing a repeat next month, with some others to see what we can find. Hopefully, the draw will go better than last time. It was both arms, and a hand before she got anything to cooperate.